


Uncertainties

by anxiousgeek



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Genre: Angst, F/M, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-07-28
Updated: 2008-07-28
Packaged: 2017-10-15 00:19:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,152
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/155102
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anxiousgeek/pseuds/anxiousgeek
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Neither of them were sure about this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Uncertainties

Neither of them were sure about this.

They both wanted it, they couldn't keep their hands off each other, couldn't keep away from each other. Every time they were alone together like this, they came closer together. Every time they were together they came closer to this, to crying and screaming, the kisses became harder, more skin was revealed. Soon they were going to break.

Soon they were going to break each other.

They weren't sure of each other, they hadn't known each other long, hadn't worked together long and until they had put their lives on the line for each other, they knew it would be a while before they could really trust each other.

But the attraction was strong. The want and need rode them hard when they were around each other and soon, soon, they couldn't hold off forever.

They were unsure because it could destroy their careers, threaten the city, threaten his attempt to save Elizabeth, threaten her life's work.

They were unsure because it could destroy each other.

They were crawling closer.

She had been on her knees in his room, his trousers and underwear in a pool at his ankles, and her lips stretched around an erection he had been trying to hide all day. She had ran his tongue around his hard shaft, tasting his pre-cum and feeling his balls. She had been pushed away when he had been about to come, as his mind had gone blank he had realised what they were doing, what she was doing to him and had managed to stop it. Stop her.

He had been pressed up against her, pushing her back against the wall of her room, her shirt open and bra pushed up, his mouth on her right breast, nipping and licking at the hard nipple there. He had had his other hand in her trousers, in her underwear, pressing down into her heat, onto her clit. When he had gone to slide a long finger into body she had forced her hips away from his hand, pulling her body from between him and the wall, stopping him. Stopping them.

They had spent too many nights in this city, alone in their beds, their own fingers a substitute for a body, for each others bodies. Too many nights left empty, the pleasure brief and more painful than anything else.

Too many nights pacing their quarters.

***

He should never have gone to her quarters and she should never have let him in. That was obvious. But his kisses were wonderful and addictive and her body was beautiful and alluring. They were so unsure but they wouldn't hold off any longer, he couldn't stop himself from stripping her completely, pulling her blonde hair free and she couldn't stop herself from leading him to her bed, ruffling the unruly tufts of brown on his head.

It was months of foreplay, a torturous work up for one moment.

He settled on top of her, kissing her all the while as he positioned his body in line with hers, position his hard erection at her hot centre. He waited, for any kind of sign that she was so unsure that she wanted to stop. She waited for him to move, she wasn't going to make any sign either way, she wasn't sure she wanted to be the one to break them. Just because he was on top of her, didn't mean this was the moment, didn't mean they couldn't just walk away from this.

That illusion was shattered with one swift thrust into her body and the silence was broken by her cry.

Just because she didn't want to break them, didn't mean she wouldn't break first either.

She wrapped her legs around him and pulled him deeper into her body, and he started moving, hard and desperate. Just because he hadn't been sure, didn't mean he didn't want more of her. He kissed her again, trying to hold on his own moans and grunts as she became more and more vocal.

They hadn't been sure about this, because they hadn't known how the other would react. Sam could be so careful and calm in a crisis but she was completely different now, out of control and moving with him, moaning with every deep thrust into her tight body. He could be so unpredictable out in the field, but he was in complete control of himself now and the situation. He would break her, then let go.

Hands palm down on the bed, her legs up on his shoulders, he moved with all his energy, all his soul. He bit his lip, moving deep inside her body, deeper and deeper. She was so hot and wet and he was screaming inside to come, screaming inside to hear her her cry out his name.

He was sure about this but he was certain that he wanted to hear his name on Sam Carters lips.

When she choked out a strangled, 'John', her body squeezing him tight and shaking beneath him, he came, groaning loud. He whispered her name and lost any rhythm he had, shaking with her, tears falling down his face.

He had been unsure about this because he knew she had the power to make him cry.

He didn't collapse. He had come hard inside her body and now he held himself above her, looking own at her, as she kept her eyes squeezed closed, panting beneath him.

“Sam?” He tried not to sob out her name, but he couldn't help himself, he hadn't cried for years and he wasn't sure what it was about her that made him break like this. Once wasn't going to be enough but he had a horrible feeling she would take everything he had to give and make him cry every single time. He wanted to walk away, he really did, just pull out of her, get off her, get out of this room, her room, her body.

He couldn't. She had all the power and until she told him to go, he wasn't going to move.

Her legs fell away, he wasn't sure how she had still been holding them up like that, but now wasn't the time to ask. He slipped out of her, and there was a little whimper and she finally, finally opened her eyes to look at him.

There were tears in her eyes too.

She closed them again, to try and hide them from him, but a couple fell, the overspill and he fell onto the bed beside her. He didn't pull her to him, he just lay be her side as she lay straight and broken beside him.

He wasn't sure about what was going on between them, if she realised she had the power, if she wanted the power, or but he was broken now, hers and he wasn't going anywhere until she told him to.


End file.
